Why wine merchants make better friends than midwives

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Wine merchants are trusted advisors to viticulture enthusiasts everywhere, helping to point out the best regions, grapes and vintages.

And of course, midwives play a crucial role in advising expectant parents on how to look after their children.

But considering the cost of raising a child, you might be better off putting parenthood on the back burner and spending more time at the wine merchants instead - your home will thank you for it.

According to a report from NFU Mutual, children are the biggest risk to properties apart from water damage, and boys are nearly two-thirds more likely than girls to cause enough damage to warrant a home insurance claim.

In fact, kids cause 22% of all accidental damage claims - compared to just 3% caused by cats and dogs.

As for wine, some people do claim for stains caused by spilt wine, but you can always just drink white if you're worried.

Even if you drink red, the risk of a major stain caused by a spill is pretty small - according to NFU Mutual, you can add together wine stains, paint spills and fires, and you still don't get to the number of claims made because of children.